The ‘Ex’ Dilemma

Hey ladies!

So today I will be writing about dilemmas you might have about talking or not talking to your ex boyfriend/s. Let’s face it, we all attracted some douche bags in the past… But does this give us the right to be act all high and mighty and never speak to them again? Yes.

But what about those sweet nice ones, with whom it just didn’t work out… ? Should we leave them out of our lives completely?

This is what I think…

  1. Those guys who hurt you and your family, were not worth your time back then… let alone now. You have every right to be a bit*h. You can be as free with deleting their numbers, their emails, their Facebook friendship, see how far you wanna go.


  2. When it comes to the nice ones, always keep in mind WHY you are not with them anymore. Something went wrong, so still, don’t be overly attached to them even if you are still friends.

    That’s Why…

  3. If you think you can forgive them for what they did, go ahead. If you think you can understand why they had to end it with you, don’t feel guilty about it, even if it was your fault. Don’t hold grudges unless you really need to, but don’t be stupid and fall for it again.

    Not Anymore

  4. Take your time. No one said you HAVE TO be friends. You need to heal from what happened and mourn the relationship before you can look at them again without being angry. When you think you can do it, don’t hold back from letting them in again – but always be careful.

    I’ll be just fine.

  5. Remember who your man is. Don’t put your ex’s opinion before your current boyfriend’s who’s been great to you. Remember who your man is.

    Who’s your man?

  6. Don’t force your friendship. You don’t need to be best buds. Truth be told, there will always be a what if feeling in one of you if not both, so don’t play with fire. Invite them to a picnic with friends or a birthday party, but don’t go all out to show how you are alright with them being in your inner circle. They don’t need to be – and it’s a bit weird if they are.

    Seriously… you are.

  7. Don’t tell them things you wouldn’t tell your boyfriend. That’s a breach of confidence you should never step on. I’m sure they are not your only friends, so if you need to talk, talk to someone else. Don’t complain to them about your current boyfriend. They’ll think you are flirting and that you want them back.

    No… No telling secrets!

  8. Declare where you at. If you think you will never be with them again, don’t stay friends and make them wonder. Ok, stay friends as much as you want, but be clear about the fact that you are not moving backwards and that you are happy with your man and wouldn’t change that for anything.

    Where we’re at.

  9. Never meet them behind your boyfriend’s back. And why should you? You do not really need to see them regularly or have lunch or coffee. You can meet them when other people are around.

    None of that.

  10. Try to treat them like anyone else. This is probably the hardest, since you shared some time together and there are things which only the two of you know. But that is in the past… Don’t reminisce about the good times with them at 1am in the morning. Nothing good can come out of talking to guys who aren’t family or just friends in the middle of the night.

    That’s us now.

That’s what I’d do. What do you think? Would you do anything differently? Let me know in the comment section.



7 comments on “The ‘Ex’ Dilemma

  1. Mammu says:

    This is a great post. In the past this has always been my dilemma, I never knew how to cut them out. Now I’m with my hubby for 8 years and I’ve cut them all out even the most dear one and it feels great! Sometimes we don’t have a choice cause of common friends but we need to think why we want to be friends with them so much, cause we feel quilty or we still like them neither of those two should be a reason to stay friends. I did few of the NOs of this post and useless to say it only brought me trouble. Before meeting my hubby I thought we should all be friends with our exes and hang out and everything but now I think the more they stay far away the better it is for everyone! 🙂

  2. marijadebono says:

    Reblogged this on marlingual and commented:

    This is what I wrote on my other blog… seemed to have been liked by the ladies as well as some gents! Obviously, all can also be applied to ex girlfriends!

  3. Amria says:

    I think you also have to stay away from the people you broke up with because that way you can also help them move on and not give them false hope. I am such a mean tiny person, I’d kill them all but I suppose staying away from them is safer 😀

  4. Martina says:

    Well done Marija, what a great post!

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